Rumor Has It

Little in the middle

Wednesday, August 28, 2019

I’m watching the MTV Video Music Awards as I write this week’s column, and so far I have learned the following things: 1. No one is having more fun barnstorming stages than Lizzo. Long may she reign. 2. There are three Jonas Brothers, but only two of them sing. The third one plays guitar and lip syncs and wonders why no one makes eye contact with him. 3. Missy Elliott is a queen, yesterday, today, forever.

Oh and something, something, Taylor Swift. Now you don’t need to watch VMAs because I did it for you.

Back to Lizzo, not only did she blaze her way through “Truth Hurts” and “Good as Hell,” but she also did it in front of a giant inflatable ass, providing me with a segue that is such a gift, I’m almost convinced God exists and really has a thing for inflatable body parts.

Because there is only one other artist I can think of who has also been in possession of a giant inflatable ass used for performance purposes: Sir Mix-A-Lot. And it just so happens that the Seattle rapper who likes big butts and evidently also cannot lie is coming back to our neck of the woods, and he’ll bring his show to a different stage than what we’re used to. Instead of performing to what has become his home at the Wild Buffalo, he’ll appear in the Walton Event Center at the Swinomish Casino and Lodge for a Fri., Aug. 30 concert. It appears to be a one-off show for the rapper, his hooptie and his posse on Broadway, and I have long since learned not to question how these things come about. Seeing Sir Mix-A-Lot at the Buff is real great because it’s within walking distance of my house, but anyone who knows me is well aware of the magnetic pull slot machines and buffet meals have over me. All I need is the promise of some “Square Dance Rap” and I’m sold. Tickets to see Sir Mix-A-Lot are still available and can be had via the Swinomish Casino’s website.

Lastly, I feel fairly certain that the lovely folks of Hot Damn Scandal would like me to remind you that they’re playing a Twilight Hour show on Thurs., Aug. 29 at Boundary Bay Brewery. Originally, I thought the purpose of the concert was to celebrate their 10th anniversary as a band. In reality, it’s their 11th anniversary—they marked a decade last year, which is a huge deal in the life of a local band. I hope we all got them something nice to commemorate their big day. If not, feel free to head to the beer garden on Thursday and shower them with gifts. And beer. But probably gifts would be the safest bet.

Past Columns
Sex In The City:

September 11, 2019

While I was sleeping:

September 4, 2019

Into the woods

August 21, 2019

Bands at Barkley

August 14, 2019

Ready, Fight!

August 7, 2019

Rock and Vote

July 31, 2019

The longest night

July 24, 2019

Remembering Peter Gunn

July 17, 2019

From the Rooftop

July 10, 2019

Breaking News

June 19, 2019

Remembering Lucas Hicks

October 11, 2017

Eat Local Month

10:00am|Whatcom County

Whatcom Water Week

10:00am|Whatcom County

Anything Goes Arts and Crafts

10:30am|Sumas Library

Nuclear Power and Weapons

6:30pm|Lynden Library

'Hamster Church with Brad Lockhart

6:30pm|Old Parish Hall


7:00pm|Alternative Library


9:00pm|Firefly Lounge

Eat Local Month

10:00am|Whatcom County

Whatcom Water Week

10:00am|Whatcom County

Grizzly Boy

3:00pm|Point Roberts Library

Cook It and Book It

3:30pm|Lynden Library

Community Conversations Book Club

5:00pm|Village Books

Artist Workshop

6:00pm|Bellingham Public Library

Skagit Folk Dancers

7:00pm|Bayview Civic Hall

Books on Tap

7:00pm|North Fork Brewery

Eat Local Month

10:00am|Whatcom County

Whatcom Water Week

10:00am|Whatcom County

Whatcom Water Week

10:00am|Whatcom County

Wednesday Farmers Market

2:00pm|Barkley Village Green

Sedro-Woolley Farmers Market

3:00pm|Hammer Heritage Square

Group Run

6:00pm|Skagit Running Company

Creekside Open Mic

6:30pm|South Whatcom Library

Brewers Cruise

6:30pm|Bellingham Cruise Terminal

Disruptive Play

7:00pm|Village Books

Native Plant Seed Propagation Basics

7:00pm|Sustainable Living Center

Brad Shigeta Quintet

7:00pm|Sylvia Center for the Arts,

see our complete calendar »